Sunday, 31 May 2015

What to do on a wet Sunday



it's wet and it's Sunday and I have checked the weather forecast and it does not look to get any better today!

So what to do.

Well luckily I got all the washing done and dried yesterday, so I think today I will crack on with the decorating. That is the odd bits that I am doing before the man comes to do the 'bigger bits'.

Yesterday was a great day at The test Match as every ones favourite 'peanut' Adam Lyth hit his maiden test century, and at Headingley too, how much better could that have been for the Whitby boy?????

Captain Cook also became the highest scoring runs maker in test history ( how did that happen??) and Jimmy Anderson finally got 400 test wickets. Yes it was all going off.

The weather was not looking too promising but everyone managed  to get a full days cricket in.

Besty friend Francesca called round with the most amazing ginger cake I have ever eaten, and it was made by her ( very funny) other half, Paul. I voted that she keeps him as he makes a mean cake.


We decided against a trip to Homebase although with the weather the way it is today , I may 'pop' down later!

After a hideously late night on Friday I found myself still wide awake at 1.45am this morning, well this will have to stop as it is not doing me any good. I found myself an hour ago struggling to get out of bed...............not very Lady Lainey like at all.


So hopefully the rain will cease and there will be some cricket at Leeds today, however this time next week I will be 'bombing' down the A1 on my way to meet Harry and Blossom, El Presidenti and First lady of Middx CCC........................now that's something that I can do today, pack my suitcase...................and sorting out shoes and handbags and dresses and...........................................


you get the drift, ooohhhh best not forget my besty cricket tiara either!!!!!!

see you tomorrow!!!


Saturday, 30 May 2015

It's a late one today




Due to the fact that I didn't go to bed until 1am!!!!....................yes you read that correctly, 1am!!!! I did not get home from cricket until about 11pm and by the time I had filled the dishwasher, sorted out the laundry and taken my slap off it was very very late ( or early as the case may well have been).

Oh my dog!!!!! I am running late this morning.

sadly the normally glamorous Lady lainey who would normally look like the picture above actually looks like this  


as I race about trying to get things done.


now it has been brought to my attention, that there are two things that I do an awful lot of, and its not watching cricket!!!
Apparently I do an awful lot of washing and I spend a lot of time at Homebase.

well let me set the record  straight.

1. I do not sleep in my bedding for more that 7 days

2. I have  5 lots of work clothes and then the weekend clothes to launder.

3. I do not leave my dressing gown for 3 years without a dunk in soapy suds.

4. I use a clean towel everyday.

5. I am having the chateau redecorated and need inspiration

6. I am not a B & Q or Wickes 'girl'

7. I obviously have way too much time on my hands!!!!

Now that this is recorded I hope that you understand my frantic twin tub action and jaunts to 'Tindale Crescent' at the weekend.

Now on to the other thing that takes up way too much of my time, cricket.

so last night was the grand debut of the new 'Floodlights' at the Riverside Ground.

we were there and ready for 7pm. True to the form of days of old in the Durham/Yorkshire derby, as the players were about to set foot on the field the heavens opened. The umpires, who I have detected do not like to get their hair wet, turned tail and headed back up the stairs for a cup of tea!

after a delay Durham came into bat and hit a 182 off their 20 overs.

I was cheering like mad for my Tykes as they came into bat, as wickets tumbled too quickly for my liking, I thought that Pauly Paul and Dynamo Dom were about to put their coats on ready for the off.!!! However Captain Gale steadied the ship slightly and then Little Timmy Brenan came in and hit a brilliant 30 which started to get the crowd ( i.e me) a little excited this could go down to the wire.

sadly though my boys lost by 6 wickets, however a great game.................if not a strange one. How odd to be sitting watching cricket at 9.30pm!!! and driving home in the dark!

Oh and there was a test match started yesterday which saw Jimmy Anderson take his 400th test wicket. And saw the day end with New Zealia on  297-8.

Today the lovely Lydia Jane and Alan are as we speak probably queuing to get through the Headingley turnstiles, as they are having a day at the test.

I know they will enjoy themselves.

And me?????

Well I am off to empty the washing machine and get the next load in , before heading off to Homebase with besty friend Francesca for a look around.

Until tomorrow

Have a great day!










Friday, 29 May 2015

It's cricket F(ryan)day...............



....................and it's raining!!!!!!!!!


Is the Durham v Yorkshire curse about to strike again?????? After two seasons of basking in sunshine at this particular T20 match, we look to be returning to the seasons of past, one thing is for sure though, His Royal Ryanness will not be there. Boooohooo!!!!!!

Never mind, Gillespie the Gallant will be, sat in his 'coaches' chair, so that sort of makes up for it.


last night saw former besty home county of Durham in action against Leicestershire Foxes in a T20 match that  was not that exciting I hate to say.  Durham won but were very slow to get off the bowling mark.

I am wondering what is going on at Notts, 'Big Unit' Luke fletcher seems to be in the news a lot, the 26 year old ( yes he is only 26!), had not played a county game and then played a blinding T20 match, only to be loaned out to Surrey for 3 games. Now 'Top man' Mike Newell has said that poor Lukey needs to lose some weight if he wants to play international cricket.

Does this man not know that you should never highlight weight issues to youngsters????? it can cause all sorts of problems. To be honest I think that Luke has things on his mind which may be affecting him in all kinds of ways, he has been injured and now on top of this being told to 'lose weight'.

I personally think he looked a lot more sylph like this season than last.

And as my hypnotherapist told me you should never think of 'losing weight' as if you lose something you want to find it again!!!!!

Come on Luke pull your socks up, breathe  in and lets see you in the England team.

Oh I have just looked out of the window and it appears to have stopped raining, this however still does not fill me with joy as the sky looks grey and miserable.

I have also blagged another day at Headingley in the company of El Presidenti and First Lady of Middlesex CCC. This is due to the first Lady celebrating her birthday, so it will be PARTY TIME!!!!

So I am off to do 7 hours of hard graft ( yeah right!!!) and then i am off up the A1 to jolly old Chester Le street.


#COYT





Thursday, 28 May 2015

Tired Thursday




The sun is shining and the sky is blue, but the wind is blowing a gale outside and I am struggling to decide if I need my liberty bodice and thermal thong on today or if I can  'dice with danger' and wear a t shirt and cardigan! Oh dear the trial and tribulations of 'summer'. think I will be better off putting on extra layers and removing them if the day warms up!

I am very very tired this morning due to spending most of last evening in the company of 'Jack Bauer', he's a rough tough guy I can tell you. yes I am once again immersing myself in '24' world. Well it beats doing housework!

So on to more important things, cricket is starting to warm up a bit as we are now nearly in June and the title race is moving on. Durham won their game against Worcestershire despite every effort by Jack 'Commando boy' Shantry. they are top of the table but have one game in hand. They are followed by Middlesex and Yorkshire. That should make for an exciting match next weekend when I am with the Middx President. I think he knows that I will not be cheering for 'his' boys!

Yorkshire drew their match with Somerset and are now gearing themselves up to perform brilliantly on Friday evening for I, Lady Lainey, when I step out to watch them at Chester le street. I will escorted by Pauly Paul and Dynamo Dom. I hope that they are on their best behaviour.


Trill Boy was on his best behaviour yesterday, today though Job the Jolly returns from his jollies in Spain and if he hasn't brought me a donkey or at least a stick of rock there is going to be  BIG trouble!


Tomorrow  sees the start of the 2nd test at Headingley and things are gearing themselves up for that. I have the radio tuned in already!

I am to take responsibility of Tzarina Katerinas car when it goes into be 'repaired'!!!! She has just returned from a month crossing the Atlantic and stopping off at various places en route and is now doing her washing in preparation to heading off to the Baltic for some sightseeing ( that means shopping!!!! ). Her car is a minor problem for her as she has passed it onto me to sort out for her!!!


Ahh the joys of family life!

Well I am now off to experience the joys of office life.

I hope that you all have a good day.

Wednesday, 27 May 2015

Flipping heck it's mid week already!




So it is mid week and closer to cricket Friday, because  of this I am trying to cram as much into the next two evenings as possible.  which will mean, I come home from work and do sweet fanny adams!!!!!

I do however have the rest of the weekend off from going to cricket and will spend it doing 'stuff' in the garden, whilst blasting out TMS and cheesing off the neighbours.

So what else has been happening in the wacky world of Lady lainey Land.

well it was finally announced that the worst kept secret in cricket land was true and that Trevor Bayliss is the new England coach. Well jolly good luck to him as I think that he is going to need it!

Former besty home county of Durham were fighting on in Worcester, although 'commando boy' Jack Shantry was trying his hardest to  bowl everyone out on the Durham team. meanwhile Big John Hastings was trying the same to Worcestershire

Yorkshire and Somerset were really battling it out at Taunton and I would have paid good money to have been there to see it.

Well all will be unravelled today.


I paid a couple of flying visits to see Tzarina Katerina over the weekend, after she told me she had, had a little mishap in the Kiki Kar.

' I reversed into a lorry' she said

' not a lot of damage' she said

' I can get it fixed' she said

'it was in  my blind spot' she said.

Flipping nora!!!!!!! when I saw the car I wondered about her 'blind spot' and came away thinking that my eldest sibling is actually Stevie Wonder!!!!!!!

Not only do I have  'Demolition Derby Didi' ( she took out the garage door after hitting the wheelie bins) ,I now have Kiki Kar killer!!!!!

Off to the office now, just Trill Boy and I........................the fun just never ends........................




Tuesday, 26 May 2015

DIZZY, I'M SO DIZZY......







my head is spinning, and so am I in my  chair ....................OK enough of that or pineapple and plum smoothie  will be adorning the walls!!!!!!!!

It's a super fine day today, all the worries of the last couple of weeks have gone and I can now get on with the rest of the season in a state of super excitedness.

Yes it looks like Gillespie the Gallant is staying with my beloved Tykes. how much better could the start of my working week be!


This man made my birthday back in 2011  ( 15th November) when they announced on that auspicious day that he was to take the reins of the Yorkshire team, since then he has taken them from Division 2 to the T20 final in 2012 where they lost to Hampshire.

we saw them promoted to the top flight and then fight tooth and nail losing out to Durham as county champions in 2013.
however Gillespie the gallant was not deterred, he worked hard with the team and finally on 12th September 2014 they lifted the County Championship trophy.



this is the man who supplied England with 6 players at the start of the season and continues to bring forward new players who are currently playing brilliantly for the club.


yes I am biased, I have a deep admiration for Jason, having watched him at international level and also when he played at Yorkshire.

I know that he did not do this single handedly, however his no nonsense approach has been exactly what Yorkshire needed.

Now I can settle down to the rest of the season in the knowledge that he is striving to bring the club more silverware.

All is nearly well with the world, we just have to get His Royal Ryanness fit and playing again and everything will be back to normality here at Chateau de Champions.


Top Tyke!!!!


Oh and we won the test match too, with some brilliant performances by the whole team, but especially Captain Cook with  a great second innings batting performance, Joe Root constantly putting runs on the board. And Ben Stokes with  great batting and bowling.

And Moin Ali with a superb catch to end the match.

The bandwagon now moves onto Headingley at the end of the week.

It's seems to be the makings for a great week!



Monday, 25 May 2015

It's Monday and it's a Bank Holiday

wooohooo it is the Bank Holiday and I already have two loads of washing done, and I am about to get ready to head off to Homebase for more DIY type things. What else are Bank Holidays for????

Well there is cricket on and after a storming day by England yesterday anything could. happen!

poor little Joey Root missed out again on getting a century, but finally Captain Cook put his bat where the money is and played like a true cricketer. He was  on an unbeaten 153 at close of play and calmly walked off the field as if he had just been doing a warm up. yes finally doing his 'stuff' and doing it well
I bet Piers Morgan is quiet now!!!

Also doing well was Ben Stokes, no foul language or thumping of lockers for him yesterday as he hit an amazingly fast century only to fall on 101.

England went to bed last night having posted 429-6 leading by 295 runs.

Who knows what today holds and to be honest I am not putting all my eggs in one basket at Sainsburys this morning! Better to be safe than scrambled!!!

My Tykes were in action yesterday in County championship style down at Taunton. they looked in great form and put on 348 runs for the loss of 8 wickets.Jack Leaning hitting 123 and Little Timmy Bresnan getting 54!!!.

#COYT

News on the BBC sport website is that Yorkshire are already looking for a replacement for Gillespie the Gallant. Holy moly!!!! They are not hanging around and this is leading to extreme speculation that Dizzy is going to England!!!!

Hmmmm this is not boding well............................

however I have a cunning plan........................

Dizzy does England, Siddy does Yorkshire.

There my bank holiday is brighter already!

that sorts out all His Royal Ryanness's injury woes as he can sit on the balcony and do the crossword (  a la Geoff cook a few seasons ago!).

Now I am off to twirl my orange curls and head off to the heady heights of Tindale Crescent  ( not something that I ever thought I would be reporting in my blog!). Homebase here I come.



Sunday, 24 May 2015

Wet Sunday!



Having been woken up at 4.30am this morning by blackbirds singing their heads off I was hoping that today would be another scorcher like yesterday..................no flipping chance, it was hosing it down outside.

it is now much later and still looking grey and overcast! Luckily there is no cricket today!

well apart from the test match and the IPL final.

Yesterday was a glorious day as besty friend Francesca and I set out to Northallerton to go and  'culteralise' ourselves at an exhibition at the Joe Cornish Gallery. I of course was instantly drawn to a wonderful picture of the 'Atlas Fountain' at Castle Howard and was totally transfixed. One of my most favourite places in the world and also where I have been chased by peacocks ( again!).

We then had a spot of lunch and shopping before heading back to the train station. We decided that the 2 minute walk from the town had been very taxing so  'popped' into The Station Hotel for a 'swift half'. I asked about the cricket result and then sudden realised that I was talking to one of my Twitter friends!!!!!!! Yes I had walked into the pub that Adie was drinking in.

As if that was not strange enough, it then unfolded that his friend had been based at HMS Warrior ( NATO base) in former home town in London!!!!! and we then spent a long time chatting about the various watering holes that we knew in the area.

It was a wonderful day and by the time that I got home I was ready for bed!!!.

I watched the highlights of the Test which saw New Zealia really make their mark and also Poor Adam Lyth not even get to double figures!!!

OOOhhhhh and I also did some washing before I left for Northallerton and it was all dry when I got home!

I am now listening to wash cycle as the bedding is in having it's weekly 'swim'.

Today I am heading over to see Tzarina Katerina ( Kiki), before coming home to do very little indeed.

I am struggling to come to terms with the fact that it is being reported that Gillespie the Gallant, will take the England job if it is offered to him.

Well Jase, I suggest you get a 4 year contract at least!.

Off to have a little sniffle now!

Saturday, 23 May 2015

A bit of culture and lunch with besty friend



And today I am putting some of my awesomeness on show..................no, not in that way!!!!

I am off to do jolly Ladylike things today, go to an Art Exhibition, and then have lunch with besty friend Francesca in the very lovely market town of Northallerton, which is also home of more of the Robinson clan.

However if you are out and about in the local area I would suggest you don some sunglasses as I have had my hair 're oranged' and I now look like Ronald McDonald's sister!!!!! Not to worry it will have faded somewhat before  the big Durham v Yorks T20 match next week..........I hope!


Yesterday was an 'Ummmm' day at the test as England seemed to be wavering against  The Blackcaps. Kane Williamson 9 adopted Tyke) hit an unbeaten 92  and New Zealia closed on  303-2.

last night I took up my front row seat  ( in my sitting room) to watch the T20 match at Southampton. I was all set for a great innings by Michael Carberry ( supporting him in the Dames absence), and  flipping heck if he didn't go and get himself out in about one nano second ( well it seemed like it). well it didn't get any better  and Hampshire lost to Kent.

However My Tykes did beat Notts and quite convincingly too, by 7 wickets. 

Former besty home county of Durham also won by 16 runs against leicestershire.

Quite a night all round.


Gillespie the Gallant has confirmed a couple of positive conversations with Andrew Strauss ( would have liked to have been a fly on the wall for those!). And also that there are others in the frame for the England coaching job.

Well good luck to the others I say!!!


Please do not do it Jason, Yorkshire needs you!!!

What ( North ) Yorkshire does not need today though is a 6ft 3in walking 'Belisha Beacon'......................but hey you don't always get what you want do you??????

OK off to 'Vosene' my hair and see if it calms down in colour.

have a great Saturday..................I intend to.


AWESOME!!!!








Friday, 22 May 2015

It's F(ryan)day



I am hoping that today is a 'good' F(ryan)day, after all it is now soooooo nearly the weekend. I am 7 working ( and I use that term very loosely) hours away from 'party weekend' which after last week will involve lots of drinking of 'Diet coke'!!!


So yesterday was the start of the 1st test against New Zealia. England went into bat and made a very shocking show in the top order. it took little Joey Root and Ben stokes to halt the serious decline that has become known as English cricket. Wickets fell so fast that it too Moin Ali by surprise and he couldn't back back from the nets to the pavilion to pad up for his 'turn'.
In hind sight this was not a bad thing as Stokes very nearly hit a century, as did Joey Root who was halted 2 runs away from the magic number.

This helped England steady the ship and sailed back into harbour last night on 354-7.

However the waters around the Home of cricket are still a little choppy as there has been no word on whether Gillespie the Gallant will take on the role of England coach. Andrew Strauss did offer up that a coach may come after The Ashes. So what does that actually mean?????


Tonight see T20 action and  although not for us here in the icy wastes of the North, we will just have to see what is on 'True movies' to keep us entertained.

Yesterday I was berated on Twitter for my 'Durham Coach bashing'. So let me just set the record straight.

This is MY blog

I write in MY blog what I think.

If you want to sing the praises of the the Durham Coach write YOUR own blog!

I am not 'Anti Durham' I have been a member from day one, ( how many other readers have been?). I am however a great supporter of the County of my birth ( Yorkshire) and also closely follow Hampshire.
I am a great lover of cricket and was brought up in a great cricketing family ( where some members still play today at the ripe old age of 67!!! now that is a true love of the game!).

I do not just 'bash' Durham, I also comment on other teams and write as I see fit...................................and am off on a rant..........................on F(ryan)day!!!!!!!


So now that I am fired up I  guess I had better go and take it out on office boys!!!!!







Thursday, 21 May 2015

Dark clouds rolling in!!!!




Today I fear that the dark clouds are rolling in and can only hope that if there is a rainbow there is a pot of Yorkshire Dizzy at the end of it.
Yes!!! Yesterday afternoon, news filtered through that Gillespie the Gallant had been approached about the England job.......................I felt a complete soaking in a vat of wine coming on. However I decided that Diet Dandelion and Burdock would have to soothe my very fevered temper!!!

All will be revealed at some point today or tomorrow.

I love Gillespie the Gallant, I always have, I was an avid 'Australia watcher' when he played for his country, I loved seeing him when he played for Yorkshire ( and took wickets on my command, well it seemed that way). Having him as coach at  Yorkshire was the highlight for me, especially as his appointment was confirmed on my birthday!. And then his amazing track record there. Surely he wants to stay and further their success?

Well only time will tell.

Why don't they approach Jon Lewis the Durham Coach? he has managed to put Durham in a worse tail spin than England........................ just my point of view.

Durham managed to lose again yesterday despite a few valiant attempts to draw it back.  The Durham team are a bit like the England team, a few good players and some 'dead wood' that needs clearing out. I wonder if there is a 'problem child' in the dressing room..................

Strange things at Notts, director of cricket Mike Newell said that their bowing attack was not good enough in their match against Somerset. Now although I am not a Notts fan, I do keep my beady eye on what is going on around the counties, and I feel that I should point out that this season they omitted one of their great bowlers from first class matches and then shipped him off to Surrey.
Yes Mike Newell!!!, bring back 'the man mountain' that is Luke Fletcher. Considering how he bowled in the last T20 match he played for Notts.
Maybe England should look at Newell he has all the qualifications, total fruit cake, no idea, and blames everyone else.

There I have sorted out the England coaches role without Gillespie the Gallant even having to speak to Andrew Strauss


Anyhoooo, Dame Didi will be waking up on home turf today ( well very nearly) and will start her next big adventure. Hopefully Chateau Didi trois will be waiting for her and she can then  spend her days pottering around in the garden and swilling champers by the bucket load.

I however am pottering off down the A1 to Lady laineyville and swilling coffee in overloading type quantities, whilst shouting my head off at boys to get them to do some work.

And if you heard about my little mishap with flapjack yesterday, when I missed my mouth and it disappeared into the dark depths of my top.................................do not fear, I found it nestling close to the scaffolding that supports the windsocks that profess to be 'lingerie'

Too much information!!!!??????

Oh well until tomorrow, when it is the best day of the week.

A tout a l'heure




Wednesday, 20 May 2015

Well, what is today about then?








Flipping heck, after yesterdays very 'deep' blog I thought that I had better liven it up a bit today!!!!

Yesterdays blog was not as dark' as it might have seemed, it just seems that I have had something of an 'epiphany'. I always thought I had my 'head screwed on properly', now I seem to have even more so.

So what about other things that have been happening?

Well Durham have been playing 'poo' ( serious technical cricket term). And have been given a master class in  cricket by Warwickshire. Rain was possibly helping there cause a little, but i am wondering what is going on at the former champion county?

Meanwhile in the land of T20 friendlies, Yorkshire ( and especially Jonny Bairstow) have been giving a master class in clocking up runs whilst entertaining the folk of Pudsey. these friendlies have been in aid of Rich Pyrahs benefit, and last night  they were at Harrogate. this match however was  another wash out ( like Marton a couple of weeks ago). The weather is not being kind to my Tykes although everyone was able to see Glenn Maxwell warming up, after his arrival at the county yesterday.
They now move onto York and hopefully this will see some play.

News re the Durham V champions of the world T20 match on May 29th is that it will be a 7pm start and under the new floodlights, which they seem to have installed in double quick time. the good thing about the later start is that I will have more time to don more layers as you just know that it will be freezing.


Today Dame Didi is off home to France to look for Chateau Didi trois. We had a very long chat yesterday morning re the meaning of life ( prompted by my blog) and she is off to find her dream home.  she had already made the decision not to take the an army of Border Terriers with her ( Achilles, Hector,  and Poppy). I am just hoping that when she gets there she does not decide to get a French ' frou frou' dog, and dress it up like her old french neighbours did with theres ( some kind of doggy bondage gear!!!).


So leaving you that with that thought I am off to Super swanky Lady Lainey office where I am having  'treat breakfast' with Pony Paul ( we are the only ones in today. Job the jolly is off on his jollies to Spain and Trill boy is babysitting!!)

have a great Wednesday, not long until the weekend.............and it's a long one!!!!







Tuesday, 19 May 2015

What's it all about?



As I stood in the indoor market in Lady Lainey workville yesterday, queuing behind two ladies with their matching 'Michael Kors' handbags, discussing their golf lessons and personal trainers, I began to wonder 'what is it all about?'.

Is life all about having the latest 'must have' handbag?
A brand new car?
Living in a certain area?
Having 3,000,000 followers on twitter or  Facebook?

Well I don't and don't want to drive a brand new car ( I have in the past and it doesn't make you happy).
I lived for nearly 20 years in one of the most exclusive and wealthy  areas of North West London. This did not mean that you had drinks parties round at the neighbours ever night, as you mostly did not know or see your neighbours.

I don't ( or want to) have golf lessons ( I would rather poke sticks in my eyes), and I know that the car you drive does not emulate the person you are.

I have a friend with a very success business, all the trappings that go with it and a very flash, very fast performance car.His life however is far from what it should be looking at the trappings of wealth.
it's funny to realise that happiness is not about how much money you have, what you spend it on, or who you mix with.

happiness is what you make for yourself.

it is not about spending huge amounts of money, I spent less than some people spend on a packet of cigarettes and had the most amazing morning touring Headngley earlier in the year, some may not find that a joy, but to me it was money well spent.

My love of cricket is not every ones cup of tea, but it is something that makes me happy, from watching internationals to watching club or school cricket. the pleasure of spending a day in sun, wind rain and sometimes snow cannot have a monetary value put onto it.

This is what makes me happy.

And sometimes it is a good thing to sit back and reflect on things, are the Baccarat crystal glasses  really needed, how many Piaget watches do you need?

Life is what you make it, sometimes it is not the easiest journey and you may feel that the trappings make it better,  but in the long run.............you can't take them with you.

Monday, 18 May 2015

back to work....



Surely there are easier ways to earn a crust, you have no idea how difficult it is to go to Super swanky lady Lainey office, shout at boys, drink copious amounts of coffee AND look pretty for 7 hours, flipping heck, it is positively draining!!!.

My ideal job? official tea lady for the Yorkshire team?, kit bag carrier for the Yorkshire team (although with my back that could be short lived), dressing room attendant for the Yorkshire team? I think that you can see a theme here.

However back in the real world..................more things to do this week to complete super big builds.

Yesterday saw the start of County Championship matches, although My Tykes are not in action, but they are playing a couple of friendlies this week to keep their hand in!.

Durham were in action against Warwickshire and made early progress by reducing the hosts to 18-2, but Warwickshire fought back and a very 'odd' bowling spell by John Hastings ( way too many no balls) meant that at the close of play  Warks were on 417-7.

Durham seem to make early results and then fall by the wayside!

Middlesex were down in Hampshire and not fairing too well either with Hampshire building a good platform for day two. They were 295-5 at close of play.

Meanwhile, Stuart Broad ( who I don't rate at all) has been in a spot of hot water with the ECB,after missing a sponsors function. He claimed to have woken up with a migraine, however reports of a drinking session with former team mate Matt Prior were doing the rounds, which led Mr Broad to apologise to the ECB.

Hmmmmmm sometimes I think that restraint should be in order which is rich coming from me, I however do not play for England.


Ok it's a short one today as lots to do and people to see.

So until tomorrow, have a great start to the working week and enjoy!!!



Sunday, 17 May 2015

feels like Doomsday!!!!



The news in brief as I think my head is going to explode..............

1. Was going out for a champagne filled evening and dinner

2. Black knight of the Ferrari kicked up a fuss over a forgotten booking at swanky restaurant

3. Black knight of the Ferrari was asked to leave said restaurant and not darken it's doors again

3. Black Knight of the Ferrari returned to the chateau with a 'Tex Mex chicken pizza from the Co op

4. We polished off too  many bottles of Perrier Jouet

5. I think  I might not be able to do any washing today

6. Black Knight of the Ferrari is snoring on the sofa ( I at least made it to my bed!)

7. we took way too many 'selfies' ( was funny at the time!)

8. the sitting room and kitchen look as if a bomb has exploded.

9. I never learn!!!!

10.I am NEVER drinking again!!!!



oh and I had a chat with 'The first Lady' of Middlesex CCC, which was great and am looking forward to seeing her on 7th & 8th of June ( when I will not be drinking!).

have discovered that ginger spiced popcorn is the best thing ever!

Now I am going to wake up Black knight and make him eat a fried egg sandwich ( yes the culinary delights continue).

Shame on Notts CCC  after watching Luke 'big unit' Fletcher bowling  Yorker after Yorker on Friday evening I am shocked to hear that they are sending him out to Surrey!!!!!!

Hope he gives the over inflated ego a good pasting whilst he is there!

And talking about that ego, he will not still not shut his 'biltong hole'. now wittering on about how the ECB offered him a clean slate. All the better for him to send more texts..................although I doubt that he has any friends in the New Zealia team!.

OK Paracetamol, coffee and fried eggs are calling ,
Hope I feel better tomorrow!!!




Saturday, 16 May 2015

A Tale of Two cities ( sort of)



So last night was the start of the T20 'season' and Mr Funky the chauffeur picked me up in the big blue tank thing and we then went to collect Pauly Paul ( who was touting his trade at the bus stop but not getting much interest!). The sun was shining so we all were thinking happy thoughts..................... we headed off to Cherster le street (OK not really a city but home of former besty home county of Durham).

Meanwhile over in the besty city in the world ( apart from Paris), Leeds, they were planning a late start to give the floodlights a debut in their match against Derbyshire.

Durham were taking on Northants and let me say they have a couple of 'rotund' players on their squad! partial to a slice  ( or whole) cake I think. Which is rich coming from the 'Queen of cake'!!!!!!
Durham have employed a very excitable young pup to man the PA system for the T20...................he needs to take some sedatives and lie down in a dark room.

Chester the Lion was up to his usual hysterical antics mimicking the Durham players, this had to be the highlight of the night and the guy in the costume deserves an 'Oscar' for his performance!!!

Anyhooooo, Durham went into bat and lost Mark Stoneman very quickly, however The clan MacLeod should be very proud of their son who went in and scored  60 along with Mustard who hit 51.Durham finished their innings on 174...................as big spots of rain started to fall on my freshly washed barnet!!!

By the time Northants came out I was wrapped in a blanket and the rain was steadily falling.Wickets tumbled as quickly as the rain was coming down until the umpires decided that they did not want to get their coiffure wet and they all went off.

Meanwhile over in Leeds, Yorkshire put Derbyshire into bat and saw them all out on 128.
Young Matthew Fisher saw bowling scores of 5-22, wowwweeeee, well played that teeny Tyke!!!!!
Captain Gale was in opening and scored 41 with Jonny Bairstow only one run behind on 40.
My Tykes beat them by 7 wickets.

Back on the rain sodden boundary, we saw the umpires signal that the game was all over and packed up to go home knowing that Durham had won. This was calculated on the very difficult to understand ' Jack & Vera Duckworth method'. You calculate the winning by adding how many arguments Jack & Vera had in their married life, divided by how many pints Jack could drink in an afternoon session, multiplied by how long Vera worked at Mike Baldwins 'knicker factory'. Hey presto the winner!.

It is actually called The Duckworth Lewis method for the uninitiated but the calculation is very nearly the same!!!!

All said Durham came out on top, as did My Tykes.
South Durham ( aka Hampshire) also won  with Michael Carberry hitting a very pleasing 36.


And today??????

well the dishwasher is on, the first load of washing is about to start it's spin cycle and I have British Gas coming to give me back hot water after they took it away when they serviced my boiler.

I also have the decorator coming to give me a quote on the sitting room and dining room, and after that I think it will be time for 'rubbish telly' and a  nap!

Good grief!!!!! I am exhausted at the thought of it!


Friday, 15 May 2015

Ahhh it's F(ryan)day




Yaaaahooooo, it is F(ryan)day and I am yip di flipping skippety dooo daa happy today.  Why I hear you all ask?

Well just because the working week is nearly over and another  weekend is looming large. I will be wearing my painting tiara as I am determined to get 'mon boudoir' finished and all put back into place and for it to be a haven of calm and serenity again.

I had my Indian Head massage last night and have to say I slept like a proverbial log,this morning I am feeling full of life, so I have already put in a load of washing!

 The problem child saga refuses to go away as 'the man with no lips' has waded into the debate ( I knew it wouldn't be long until he reared his lipless face). However he  is still sitting on  a wobbly fence by saying that 'maybe' KP deserved another chance. Flipping Nora, he has had more chances than you get in a game of Monopoly!!!!  And to be honest I think that he 'lipless' wonder only made the statement as he has been under the press radar himself for a little while.We all know the old adage ' any publicity.....'

Tonight see the start of the T20  season and cricket takes on a shorter form. not my ideal love, but a money spinner for the clubs ( especially former besty home county of Durham where a bottle of 'dentists mouthwash' is £1000000.000000 a bottle and it takes 6 of these to get you even remotely merry).

The shine has been taken off these matches even more pour moi, as if he had been fit to play His Royal Ryanness has taken the stand not to play any T20 or one day games. Booo Hiss!!!! shame on you, I liked sitting on my boundary watching you looking bored Ryan!

Good and bad news for my Tykes as it was announced that Adam Lyth will be playing in the up coming test against New Zealia, about flipping time I say. well done Peanut.

So without further ado, I am off to make myself look pretty and go and wow the general public................ and in the real world  I had better put some slap on before I leave the confines of Chateau de champions.

have a super brilliant F(ryan)day.

It's a cricket F(ryan)day too!!!!







Thursday, 14 May 2015

So what will today hold?



Well sadly it was not a win for Italy against Denmark, but well played those boys who ended up in third place!

The 'problem Child' saga continues thanks to the media raking up anything they can. Let it go now, he gets way too much reporting and there are lots of other players in the UK.

However as I said yesterday ( after consulting the crystal tiara and civet coffee grounds),  'injury' has struck the problem child meaning that he will not be returning to the IPL or Surrey for that matter ( well for a couple of weeks). how funny is that????, so if he had been selected for England he would not have been able to play???? Due to injury????
Hmmmmm the cynic in me is screaming ' BIG FAT FIBBER:' I fear the only injury that he has sustained is wounded ego!


My Tykes pulled off a blinding win against Hampshire yesterday although not without injury........................as Little Timmy Bresnan fell foul before start of play ( in the warm up football match) to a tackle  from Captain Gale and ended up with a nasty cut on his head and wearing a very large crepe bandage around it!!

Marin Moxon also went on record  to say that England have made no move towards Gillespie the Gallant. This has made me feel a little bit better and to be honest I think that Jason is wiser to stay where he is, as he would probably be in the dole queue this time next year. Not that I don;t have faith in his coaching, it just seems to be the way of the England coaches at the moment.


England still seems to be in a bit of a pickle to say the least.

I am thinning that the international ODI that I am off to see in June might be a bit of a shambles unless they all pull together.


Yesterday was another flipping busy day for Lady Lainey and today does not look to be easing off any, however this evening I am having an 'Indian head massage' as besty friend Francesca is coming round to 'do her stuff'.

Hopefully I should sleep like a log and wake up tomorrow a new person................well still me but a new and improved version!

Righio, off I go.....................see you later!

Wednesday, 13 May 2015

Its the hump of the week



Woohoo it is mid week, I am gearing myself up for the weekend and washing.  I am not going into my washing habits, but in a straw poll at cricket on Sunday, it seems that girls have very particular washing habits. ( i.e do not leave their dressing gowns 3 years before washing them, using a clean towel ever day and have lots of towels to wash at end of week).

As many of you will know I was once married, the former Lord Lainey would change his clothes three times a day and put them straight in the laundry, however he would use the same towel for 'years', yukkky!!!!! He was however a 'creature from another universe' and best left alone.

However less of the 'laundry saga'.

Yesterday saw former besy home county of Durham win their match against Notts, whilst my Tykes are still playing on at Headingley today. Jack Brooks was on top form yesterday taking the bulk of the Hampshire wickets in their second innings and seeing them close overnight on 37-4.

Today has dawned sunny which is a good omen, especially after Andrew Strauss officially gave  the news yesterday the there was no opening at the moment on the England team for The problem Child. True to form he went into a strop and sulked that he was 'angry and hurt' that he was not considered.......................... well where do we start.......................'text gate'..............................'Once upon a time gate'.

I wish he would just grow a pair and get on with doing what he does well, play cricket and stop whinging about how unfair and cruel everyone is to him.

I have consulted my 'crystal tiara' and the 'civet coffee grounds' and they all predict 'injury'. poor old surrey they will now take the full strength of his strop!!!!

Work was very busy yesterday, just as one O & M manual is sorted another rears it's head, which means lots of busy days ahead, I suppose that it keeps me out of mischief!

And with that I suppose it is time to wend my way to the A1 and Lady lainey workville.
Possibly time to put a load of washing in before I head off then!!!!

But before that a huge shout out to the Italian cricket team, and good luck wishes are winging their way to you today as you take on Denmark in the Euro T20 series.

GO WIN!!!






Tuesday, 12 May 2015

What is going on????



I am not sure what is going on at Durham CCC, but they seem to rev themselves up and start well and then 'wind down'  quicker than a tin robot, before nearly  coming to a complete standstill.


Wickets were tumbling like skittles yesterday and they finished their first innings on 163.
They then bowled Notts out for 173 before closing overnight on 15-1.

strange ( and dark) days in the Durham camp?

Where is the team that came from no where to win the county championship a couple of seasons ago????

Well they aren't at Chester le street that is for sure!



Meanwhile over in the heady heights of Headingley, besty home county and champions of the world, My Tykes were in action against former besty county in the south.

Brooks and Rashid both took 3 wickets a piece to bring Hampshire to 223-8. Michael Carberry ( eye candy for The Dame) managed to put on 97, shame he didn't hit a century though.
It does also seem that Adam Lyths England campaign may be over, which is sad for him but great for my Tykes.
Come on Peanut!!! hit those centuries!!!1


Fantastic news filtered through from the ICC Euro T20, when the Italian coach sent me the news that they had won  both of their matches yesterday  against Norway and Guernsey. now they just have to beat Denmark tomorrow to go through.

GO ITALY!!!!!


It was a quiet day in Super swanky Lady Lainey office due to being one boy down, which meant that every one got on with work. I completed the work on the O & M manual  for super big build in London and today it will be back to the boring archiving,   and when that gets sent down to HQ we should have enough room to swing a cat! If we wanted to!



oh yes........... and according to the BBC sports website ( so it must be correct).........................the problem child will not be playing for England ever again, that would be never never ever again.

Well to be honest after being given another chance after the texting scandal, and then writing his 'autobiography' ( fairy tale.................'once upon a time there was a little boy from south Africa who was bullied by 'big' boys from England so he texts his mates in South Africa to see if they can beat the bullies at cricket'), I  think he should consider that he had a charmed cricket career.

I am sure that AB &  Faf are quaking in their cricket box ( not) in case he tries to get into the SA team!!!!!


So lets see what Tuesday has to offer.


Bon Journee

Monday, 11 May 2015

Working week off to a flying start



If anyone had told me when I left home at 10am yesterday morning that I would see the most amazing catch on my boundary, I would have laughed my special cricket tiara off!!!!!

But I did!

Yes sitting on the boundary talking about the amount of washing I do in a week ( which was a hot topic yesterday), suddenly there was a shout of 'Catch' and as we all saw the ball hurtling towards us, Big John Hastings dived in to save two damsels from  being in toothless distress. He calmly caught the ball and turned and bowed!!!! What a flipping awesome catch!!!!!

It was a fun day I have to say, I was caught talking pictures of the Notts 'Big unit'  Luke Fletcher who very gallantly told me he hoped I had it on wide frame. I have to say he is a lot slimmer than last season.

Weather wise it alternated between warm and flipping freezing so Lainey and Janey took advantage of the fact the we had a blanky to share and  kept as warm as possible.

Mr Funky had so many hats on he resembled.................well I am not really sure what he resembled!!!!. Pauly Paul had a very fetching (read that as 'loud') bobble hat on and we must have looked like some motley crew down there on the boundary.

Close of play saw Notts all out for 245 and Durham closing on 69-3

Yorkshire were in action at Headingley against Hampshire  and were very slow off the mark, but Bairstow and Leaning decided to quicken things up a bit, and boy did they!!! He hit a quickfire century ( as he did in the Yorks T20 at CLS last season ) and gave my boys a fighting chance. They ended the day on 337-7.
They were without Liam Plunkett who seems to fallen back into his old ways and was dropped by the team for breach of discipline rules!!!!1 OMG it's like 2012 al over again.
I hope he learns from this and pulls his socks up, I was just starting to like the 'new and improved' Plunkett and then this..................

Over in the IPL it was all going off yesterday too as Abraham Benjamin  decided to jazz things up a bit (and I don't mean getting up with the dancing girls either). he hit the  a record score 133 in his match against the Mumbai Indians.
I bet you can't guess which team won ( and it doesn't start with Mumbai either)

He is truly a great and talented player.


Today is wet and miserable, which is good as I am heading off to Super Swanky lady lainey office and all that this entails. After the worst Friday on record I am hoping that this week is not too bad.

Well time to get a wriggle on and head out onto the A1.

I hope your working week is a good one.





Sunday, 10 May 2015

Cricket Sunday but..................



I prepared all the 'cric nic' yesterday with the exception of the soup and coffee which can be sorted out in a juffy, so I am having a crafty lie in and 'tippy typing ' this on my 'lapdog'.
I felt a little under the weather yesterday so decided to take it easy ( only 2 loads of washing!). Today I feel better....ish..... however reading the papers has not put me in a good mood.

Peter Moores left his position with the ECB yesterday and Andrew Strauss took over as Director of Cricket. The papers and Twitter are full of Gillespie the Gallant taking over the England coaches role, however as Pauly Paul highlighted. Jason did not take the position in South Australia, so is this a good sign? or were his eyes on a bigger prize?

The role in South Australia would have meant that he could have taken his family lock stock and barrel back home to OZ, that combined with taking a coaching role in the IPL may be a hint of the rumours being unfounded. However only time will tell.

News from Lancashire  is that 'Fatty' Flintoff will not be playing for them this season.................thank goodness for that , he turned last season into a complete circus.

Today is a cricket day as I said, the weather is cold and damp and the sky is a ' not too promising' shade of grey. I suspect that thermals and woolly hats will be the order of the day.

Dame Didi is gearing up for her trip back home to France to purchase a new Chateau, I was busy making my shopping list to replenish my supplies. Coffee, Harissa, sea salt, dijon mustard ( Amora please) and if there is any space in the Didi Daimler, some wine and champers. Oh nearly forgot, coffee filters size 2.

There the list is complete, and I should be set up for a while with that.

I would ask her to bring me some of these cakes


But I don;t think they would survive the journey.

If you are thinking that these look a 'tad rude' as I did!!! and ended up screaming with laughter in  'Hyper U'.

They are called 'glands'...................................I will leave you to Google translate that................and it's not what you think!!!

so have a wonderful cricket day ( weather permitting)
And although I will be freezing in Chester le Street, I will be keeping a close eye on Headingley.






Saturday, 9 May 2015

So what does Saturday have in store?




Well for starters I am continuing my clear out, and today I am starting on the books. I am not getting rid of 'good' books, but have a huge amount of paperbacks that need to be donated to the charity shop, however the cricket book collection continues to grow!

In my  home office I now have an ever growing pile of trash treasure to put  on to eBay. If it all sells I will have some extra cash and a lot more space in The Chateau.

What I want to know is who brought all this 'stuff' into the chateau in the first place??????

Last night after work I went to pick up some tiles so that I can 'tart' up the area surrounding ' The Gentleman of Tykeshires' stadium. Well in the shop I went and the man asked me wheat I was looking for.

'10x10 tiles please' I replied,
' What colour do you want?'

' Browny, creamy greeny please'

He rolled his eyes took me to the tiles and I came out with a load of freebies!!!
Result!!!
 I think that they may be getting a scoreboard soon too.
I think that I need to get a life!!!!

Some good news came through yesterday as it was announced that My Tykes will be playing at nearly full strength against Hampshire tomorrow, as half the team are back from England duties! Sadly one of the 'Dream Team'  still has his 'leg in a sling', no not really!!!!! That would just be silly as well as seriously dangerous for His Royal Ryanness. So I am hoping for a good old thrashing of  Hampshire ( sorry to all my Hampshire friends!).

HOWEVER!!!! the rumour mill was at full strength yesterday too as I got wind of a possible move by Gillespie the Gallant to the role of England coach.  ZUT ALORS!!!!

To say that I was distressed is an understatement.

I know that this is a perfect opportunity for him, but Yorkshire needs you Jason!!!

please do not go!!!!

Unless they replace him with  His Royal Ryanness now that could be a great plan!!!!

Personally I think that the 'Problem child' got his crayons out yesterday and scribbled his CV to send off.

well, off to do Lady Laineylike things now!







Friday, 8 May 2015

Woohooo it's F(ryan)day






Oh thank flipping goodness it is F(ryan)day, I know it was a short working week due to the bank holiday, but its been a chuffing long week for me and my backache. I cannot wait to lie on the chaise longue all weekend and eat grapes........................oh bum this is not going to happen!!!!!!! I will be making cricket lunches and teas on Saturday as we will be heading to Chester le Street on Sunday, although if I was driving I would have taken Mr Funky and Pauly Paul to Headingley.

So yesterday was election day I went to vote.....................................

So lets see what the next few years now have in store for us all.

England are taking on Ireland today in Malahide, more  Tykes were taken into the England fold for this game, Little Timmy Bresnan for one.

They are fielding a team of seven uncapped players.............

Lets see how we get on. Have to say I am not putting any pennies on it!


There has been no news on His Royal Ryanness but I suppose it is only a couple of weeks and we are still expecting a few more weeks before he is fit.

Just a message to you Ryan if you are reading this, this morning, please be fit for the Middlesex match at Headingley....................because I am going to be there! And its a long time until the Scarbados Festival.

This weekend see the start of matches with former besty home county of Durham hosting Nottinghamshire.
Whilst over at Headingley Best county and champions of the world are hosting former besty county in the south, AKA Hampshire. OOOhhhhh eye candy for the ladies in the guise of Michael Carberry.

As today is the last day of the working week, it will be bacon butties in the office and then settling down to some archiving and dealing with all things O & M!!!!!

Oh well best get ready and get my 7 hours over and  done with.

Happy F(ryan)day





Thursday, 7 May 2015

Road trip



So last night,I revved up the Lady Lainey limo and went to pick up Mr funky, as he has a gammy hand and we set off on a road trip .

We were heading to Marton Cricket Club which used to be one of the recipients of cricket teas from Lady Lainey when she was in full 'tea Lady' mode.
I had packed up our tea and also comfy chairs so that we could have a comfortable evening.

It had rained sporadically during the afternoon, all looked well when we got there and they took our money and told us where to park the limo.

However as we walked to the gate they said that the match was being abandoned!!!

Well what the 'Donald duck' was that all about????

So we took a seat and indulged in a spot of 'al fresco' dining, never mind 'al fresco' it was a bit 'al fresho' sitting by the fence I can tell you!!!!

We watched Gillepie the Gallant being interviewed and then spotted Rich Pyrah who was obviously feeling the cold as he was wearing clothes and not just a bobble hat covering his 'modesty'.

We chatted to some of the 'locals' and then hit the A174 and headed back to Lady Laineyville.


End of road trip....................riveting stuff eh?????

Well that's about as exciting as yesterday got and today is not really gearing up to be much better as it is election day and all the boring diatribe that goes with it.
I am sure that those woman who chained themselves to railings and threw themselves under horses would be turning in their graves if they saw the shower of s***e that we have to chose from re who is going to govern the country.
However that said I will still be going to put my X in a box ( close my eyes and stick the pen on ).

HOLD THE FRONT PAGE!!!! ( or back pages) news is coming through that Geoffrey Boycott, the man with the strange mouth but extreme loyalty to my beloved Tykes.He has been having a little swipe at Captain Cook!!! And I don't mean the one responsible for discovering our arch cricket  rivals, Australia,either.

Well, well, well, after Cook had a bit of a moan about Colin Graves, the incoming ECB boss, re his comments about The West Indies, Boycott chirped up that the current Yorkshire team would beat England. and let me tell you, nearly the whole flipping Yorkshire team is on the England payroll.
Boycott also said that Cook was 'out of order for publicly criticising his boss'!

Boycott also highlighted that Yorkshire has produced more England players than any other county, and added that 'Cook acts as if  he is the best Captain ever had', and 'is living in cloud cuckoo land about his captaincy ability'.

Well I think that has shaken Thursday up quite nicely.

COME ON YORKSHIRE!!!!!!

And have a great election day.




Wednesday, 6 May 2015

Lady Lainey, the chauffeur????!!!!!



Things are going a tad array in Lady Lainey land!, I, Lady Lainey am now wearing the chauffeurs hat! yes Mr Funky the chauffeur is so busy napping and the like ( as above) that he is unable to drive moi to cricket and I have to drive us both!!!!!! What in the world is it all coming too, well if he thinks I am wearing his 'chauffeurs bonnet' he can flipping well think again! I am not having my curls flattened down!

Well, Well, Well it was all going off at Lords yesterday as Middlesex decided to give former home county of Durham a taste of their own medicine and bowled the little blighters out for 71. This has been a strange match in the last couple of days , however yesterday had to be James Harris's day with bowling figures of  9-34. He took five wickets for just nine runs in the first half hour.
I got a text from the President of Middx CCC to say that he was preparing for a LLLLOOOONNNGGGGG lunch with a couple of sherry shandies to celebrate.

He also invited me along to the Middx match at Headingley in June and we confirmed our already planned date for Chester le street.
now how will it look when I am sitting at Headingley with the Middx President cheering my little heart out for Yorkshire!!!!??????

The Italian National cricket team are in preparation for some Euro T20 fun in later this week. The coach has been posting lots of pictures on Facebook, however most of them have nothing to do with cricket!!!

Some newspapers are speculating on whether Jason Gillespie would improve Englands chances. Well having seen the turnaround at Yorkshire I would say yes indeedy doody but....................................... no way do I want Gillespie the Gallant to leave my beloved Tykes. This question and Jasons name connected with the job seems to be rearing its head more and more of late which is making me have a very worried expression on my face!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Do I want to see England as a winning side???

Yes I do.

Do I want to see my Tykes as a super brilliant County cricket team?????

Yes I do

Hmmmm conflict of interest, so I suggest that he stays with Yorkshire.  #myopiniononly

Ok off to do what I do best..........................not a lot

until tomorrow

Tuesday, 5 May 2015

back to work!



This is how I feel this morning, after a sleepless night thanks to backache and the neighbours with the market stall. Oh yes loading up your van at 3am whilst talking in normal voices ( its amazing what you can hear!) and slamming van doors until finally roaring off to market at 4.15am. Yes I can see that they consider all their neighbours. I did notice when I got up for a drink that there were rather a lot of lights on in the area....................quite a coincidence that everyone was getting up at 3.30am for a drink!!!

So I will be looking forward to going to work for a sleep!

Yesterday after taking painkillers I took off into the garden and repotted the hydrangeas as well as the Boule de Neige which is now probably drowning as it is raining like mad. I also made a start on dealing with the moss problem. Mr Funky the chauffeur told me something that would kill it but they don't sell it at Homebase, so I will have to look further afield


Yesterday also saw the announcement of the  name of The Princess of Cambridge, who is now Charlotte Elizabeth, Diana. A lovely name and fitting tribute to two wonderful women.

In cricket, the news came through that Jonathan Trott was to retire from international cricket. Well this I feel comes a year too late and at the expense of some great players who were sidelined due to his selection for the current team.
Although Jonathan has served this country well in past years, his performance of late has been lacklustre to say the least.
However I wish him well in his County  cricket and now hope that some new blood will be brought into the team ( and I don't mean the problem child!).

I am hoping that the Middlesex President was not  too disappointed yesterday as former besty home county of Durham managed to demolish most of the Middx players after they themselves looked less that perfect at the crease. Today sees the home team trying to do the same to Durham!

well wet  weather is a problem for me as I have a jaunt tomorrow to cricket and believe me, the weather had better pick up! I do however have in the boot of the limo something for every weather ( including a snow shovel! well you never know). I am thinking that as Mr funky has a gammy hand I may be the designated driver.

Oh yes and I have given up booze for the foreseeable future. This is for no other reason than the fact that the recycling bin often looks a tad full!!!!

Right now I am off to done my sowester and rev up the ark, the rain does not look to be letting up!!!!


Monday, 4 May 2015

Bit late today!



Yes I was late getting up this morning, not however because I was sleeping like a baby, but due to the fact that having put my back out yesterday, I couldn't actually move when I did open my eyes. it has taken me nearly an hour to get myself out of bed!!!! Oh dear, I fear that I am for the knackers yard!!!!

Before the back  breaking incident, everything had been going well at the chateau, I had been doing some cooking and cleaning  and been out for a walk. Today I think that I might manage a 'hobble' but any thoughts of digging the garden or hoovering will have to be put onto a back burner.

Things did not go too well in The West Indies either, after Trotty did not appear on the field when WI  went in to back it was announced that he had strained a quad muscle, that must have been on the long walk back to the Pavilion as it sure wasn't for the amount of runs he put on the board!!!
Oh dear what can I say, all you cricket fans already know that we got beaten.........................so now the post mortem begins.

'Please sir it was his fault' pointing accusing finger at anyone in particular.


My view???

Should have shaken up the team and finally played the some of the bench warmers instead of trundling out the old guard. it may have shown England in a refreshing new light!.


The series is tied and England are said to be stunned.....................probably because they thought they would lose??????

Well time for them to come home and face the inquisition!

The painkillers are starting to kick in and I am about to cook myself a cracking breakfast as I am jolly flipping hungry.

Today may be devoted to the pursuit of channel hopping and drinking gallons of coffee, as well as regularly popping anti inflammatory pills and painkillers.

Oh yes and I have some new additions to the  'Cric Knits' portfolio coming up very soon, so I think that I will be cracking on with them too, I should be OK with that as long as I don't drop a knitting needle.

I am now off to try to recuperate, so until tomorrow

Bon Journee







Sunday, 3 May 2015

It's a Girl!!!



Yes indeed, we have a new Princess, and well done that girl for catching all the hacks on the hop and arriving in record time, leaving all the journos outside the Lindo Wing, still adjusting their ties and applying their lipstick ( the lady hacks that is!).

At 8.34am yesterday morning The Duchess of Cambridge gave birth to an 8lb 3oz baby girl.

By late afternoon Prince George had arrived to see his sister and by just after 6pm  The Duke and Duchess and sleeping baby went home for some privacy and rest.

Congratulations, I love babies.


other news that came through to me yesterday was via text, as I got a message from The President of Middlesex CCC saying that I should be having lunch with him at Lords!!!! I text back saying that had I known I was invited I would have been there like a shot. Not to worry though as we are now planning lots of 'meet ups' including Chester le Street in August.
Imagine 'El Presidenti' and I having to be on our best behaviour!!!!

Sporting Alfaz cicket ground being on  of the scenes of various misdemeanours, and I will never forget evenings watching 'Trumpers' cricket at MTS drinking 'overproof rum' and diet coke!
Oh yes so many brilliant times, and more to come.
And to think that Aycliffe CC had no idea they had such a legend in  their midst in November.

So looking forward to another mad summer with Harry ( and Blossom, who will no doubt keep us both in check!)

Oh dear me, it was all going off in The West Indies yesterday, as new Royal baby was going home, England looked like they should have been packing their cases too. After dismissing the W I for 189, they took to the crease..............................and very soon 5 of them were back in the hutch!! At least Trotty put some 'scores on the doors' although 'the man with no lips' went for a duck again! Those West Indian boys have got his number!!!

Even my England pin up boy, little Joey Root couldn't get a decent score and believe me 1 is not even close!!!!
England closed at 39-5

I am thinking that Middlesex President would have had a great day yesterday with the West Indies bowling well and Middlesex giving Durham a run for their money, as they closed the day  329-4

And now to today......................its raining...................end of......................so until tomorrow.



Saturday, 2 May 2015

It's 'Le Weekend'!!!




And I am feeling less than chipper, I can tell you. 3 glasses of wine, which went straight to my head and I woke up this morning with my mouth feeling like the inside of a cricketers jockstrap, not that I know what that is like you understand, I am just surmising.

I am also waiting for the tablets to kick in and  hoping that I feel better soon as I have a trip to Homebase to contend with this morning.

I have however woken up to the great news that finally Baby Watch is coming to an end, as The Duchess of Cambridge has been taken to hospital. Oooohhhhh I love babies!!

Dame Didi has been preparing to take part in 'demolition derby' as she smashed her car into her wheelie bins and took out the garage door in the process. the wheelie bins are fine though as is the car..................the garage door however is hanging on by a thread!

Great news re cousin Rt Hon Hooligan Robbo who has signed for another season at Birmingham City as player and coach. Top boy!

Now down to cricket, Well Captain Cook finally hit a century and not before time either! his first in two years. Shame the same cannot be said about Trotty, who once again was out for a duck!!!!!!

Why oh why oh why is he playing when they have Lyth sitting with his feet up!!!!??????
Ben Stokes played which deprived the brilliant Liam Plunkett of a chance, I cannot believe that they played an unchanged team!!!

Even 'the man with no lips' ( AKA Ian bell to the uninitiated) was out for a duck! I am sure that for once he wasn't spouting his mouth off! England are 270-7.
I will be settling down to watch this later, or listen on TMS if the weather holds  for me to get out in the garden.

I have lots to do today and am now about to get cracking...................well after another cup of coffee and hopefully keeping down a fried egg sandwich.

See you tomorrow when we should have news of a new Royal arrival.


Friday, 1 May 2015

You all know what day it is.........



....yes it is F(ryan)day, the best day of the week according to ( now retired) Dan Dan , Cowboy draughtsman.
And this F(ryan)day is even better as it is the start of a Bank Holiday weekend!  Three whole days off from Super swanky Lady Lainey office! Three whole days to do housework and washing and paint my bedroom and sell more of my  junk treasures on eBay.

Oh yes and I am also going to have 'The Grand' wall hanging of my signed Yorkshire shirt!! Might even get a start on my secret staircase project.......................or might spend the whole weekend, watching rubbish telly, a spot of cricket and napping. Now which do you think will be the real scenario?????

This morning has dawned sunny..................however there is thick frost on the cars across the road....................so I had a toddle out into the extensive grounds of Chateau de champions to check on my hydrangeas...........all well there so no worries.

Rumours are rife that Top Tyke bowler Liam Plunkett will be playing in the third test in the West Indies as Stokes is looking doubtful (over strained mouth?). sadly though there is no talk of changes to the top order, which means that Adam Lyth will once again be reading the Beano and playing snap for the duration!!!!  #wasteofabatsman.

Former besty home county of Durham have got permission to erect floodlights......................they'll be on most of the time I imagine. and after asking supporters to donate to the building of a nursery ground, I see them coming out with buckets  at matches,so you can put your money in for the electricity bill.

Well 'baby watch' is still ongoing and if the tabloids are to be believed, The Duchess of Cambridge is now three years overdue and being induced as we speak!!!!!!!
As none of us 'plebs' are actually privvy to the real due date, we will just have to wait, I am sure that Catherine will be as pleased as most of us when the baby arrives.

Well sort of a short one this morning, I have lots to do and need to get a wriggle on.

have a great day where ever you are.

happy F(ryan)day